Spaghettiana Spinachiana

This is a child's nightmare - pollution of a favorite food with an icky green vegetable. Recent molecular re-examination of the Pastaceae by the revered botanist, Dr. Edward Fripplefrapple lll, has firmly placed this particular genus among the ferns. These data were met with stunned silence in Olso, Sweden at the Royal Horticultural Society for Misbegotten Plants in Fall of 2025. Clearly, there will be challenges to this reclassification. Children notwithstanding, parents love this fast growing fern. It's black berries are easy to store and sprout readily from seed within minutes of planting in a rich soil. Growth is rapid so the plants will be ready for harvest in time for dinner. Hanging baskets indoors are ideal containers, particularly when hung directly over the stove - just cut off enough for dinner and let it drop straight into a pot of boiling water. Best of all, clean up is easy because S. spinachiana is ephemeral: by the time dinner is done, the plant will have borne fruit and decomposed neatly back into the soil from which it came, making your hanging basket ready for the next time you'd like to torture your kids. If you do not want to eat Spinach Spaghetti the next day, be sure to collect seeds at the soil surface and store them in a cool dark place, otherwise a new fern (?!) will sprout in time for breakfast!